Longtime Friends

I can name dozens of black friends, not just from high school but all through life. Many are now my friends on Facebook. But to me they weren’t black, they were classmates and teammates and coworkers and friends. Still are. Just regular people. My kids really don’t know who Ceil and I have associated with over the course of our lives. Here’s a little history. And fond memories. 

 

Went through so much over the years with the guys in my grade. Derry Jackson at Rosa Taylor Elementary was one of the gang. He drowned in his early teens. Angus Howard and I were two of the three musketeers. Now he’s a doctor. Lifted weights with Johnny Dennis after school three days a week for two years. Great to see him at the reunion. I cherish our photo above, despite the ill-fitting jerseys. Randy Rutherford and Ray Patterson, fun-loving but hard-charging backfield mates and middle linebackers. Roger Jackson went on to play for the Denver Broncos, and is now a shining light in Macon. The Bussey twins: Ronald and Edward. Ronald was fun-loving, and hit a half-court shot to beat Northeast. Edward was serious and tough, the skinniest offensive tackle you’ll ever see. Riding cheesehounds all over the state to play football games: Milledgeville, Athens, Augusta, Griffin, Douglasville, Warner Robins, Atlanta. Many hours in those busses with those guys. Pulling back up to the school, singing the V-I-C-T-O-R-Y song as we arrived. Also the song “Sardines Hey! And Pork & Beans” - “I can tell by your hair – you work at the Food Fair!” Good stuff.

 

I was with Larry Moore when we heard about Coach Steiner’s death. Coach John Reynolds landed the head coaching gig at Dougherty County and won a state championship. Coach Watters Campbell. Coach Reid kept his kid’s plastic football helmets in the back of his pickup. Can’t believe Tracy Curtis lost all his hair. Would’ve been a great tight end, but concentrated on basketball instead. His action photo in 9th grade was fierce, but inside he was a softie. Became a teacher and coach. Missed seeing him at the recent reunion. Greg Lofton was small in stature but a fine leader in ROTC. Married a classmate and is now a preacher. Greg “Bull” Williams hit me so hard he knocked me out, but that was football. So funny to see him kick his leg back before he kicked. Maybe that’s where he got his nickname. Waymond McKissick was a ladies man. Al Banks quit football to become the team manager. Big Tony Jordan trimmed down after high school. Linebacker Gerald Payton rode my bus. Looked completely different at the 40 year reunion. Antonio Wingfield was tall and graceful both on and off the field. Halfback Curtis Wiley was a leader. Clement Troutman was a solid guy in high school, and still is to this day. So is Jessie Anthony. He didn’t play much in high school, but got his grades up, landed a scholarship, played college ball, and tried out for the Redskins. Now he has a great looking family. Good for him. Quarterback Michael Jolly won us the state championship, breaking tackles and records and girl’s hearts. Great smile. When white teammate Stan Putnal was in the hospital it was Jolly who went to visit him. Glenn Neal just wanted to play defense. Little Wayne “Bug” Bowdry was a favorite of Coach Seward. He’s still a mover and shaker in Macon. Valerie Code had great hair. Jerry Anderson had him some talent. Kerrell Goolsby was a piece of work. The black Howard Cosell. Still see him commenting on Atlanta sports.  I knew Dallas Foster in junior high. Took the same classes all through high school. We got the most votes for senior superlative. Dallas was the heart and soul of our entire class. He went to Vanderbilt then moved to Texas. Saw him at reunions.  Later I visited him several times at St Josephs while he was waiting for a heart transplant. Sure miss Dallas.  Reginald Lucas was hilarious. Married studious classmate Cynthia. How’d he manage that? Guess because she is smart. Al Green always looked like he was up to something.

 

Was recently thinking about something the happened on the way to the state science fair in 9th grade. 1974. Several in our class made the trip: Catherine Hendricks, Bob Brewster, Chuck Wood, Don Lott, Stuart McLemore, and others. My buddy Don and I rode to Athens in the back seat of a big old sedan, driven by the mother of a classmate, who rode shotgun. We knew this classmate from school, though he wasn’t a close friend or anything. Not in the same crowd. Sitting between Don and me in the back was our black classmate Anthony Corbett. Anthony was a good guy, though we didn’t really know him very well. He was smart as I was. A regular guy, not an egghead or anything like that. Like me, I don't remember him hanging out with the super smart people.  As we drove up the two lane country road, our classmate in the front seat – with his mother next to him – saw some people on the side of the road and exclaimed “Look at that nigger!” Don and I were shocked. We’d never heard him talk that way before. That word was not in our vocabulary. Then he said it again. “Look at that nigger!” His mother didn’t say anything. Don said firmly “Shut up!”  But the classmate continued. “There’s another one! Nigger nigger nigger!” I firmly said “You’d better shut up!” Finally he realized what he’d done. The car ride got real quiet after that. Anthony, I’m still sorry. The memory haunts me to this day. Something I’ll never forget. Over the next several years Don and I would discuss that moment, and how stupid and wrong and racist that classmate had been.

Thinking back, I wonder how that moment affected Anthony. Does he still remember it as vividly as me? Did it cause him to slip as a student? I remember seeing him around, but not really as part of any of my classes.

 

In college (and many years thereafter) I played softball and basketball with Jerome Mathis. Lonnie ran those hot gasket machines at Sepco. When my car broke down I called coworker Darryl Phillips, and spent Thanksgiving night at his house. Darryl and I went to Braves games, UGA games, Tech games, basketball games. We go out for lunch together. Once I took him to the doctor when he was sick. We’d finish each other’s sentences. Years later I attended his funeral. I miss old Darryl. His widow Pam. I’ve worked with Margo Ricks for 25 years. Rico Daniel made things happen at his shop. Johnny Clayton runs a tight ship out in the warehouse. Antwon is skinny but is still a bundle of energy. He does a great job coordinating and communicating. Lewis McGee is the best manager the gold building has had in years, and he’s hilarious to boot. Joe Jackson is learning the ropes in shipping. Now I work with Mowbrey Jemmott every day. Love his upbeat and positive attitude. Ladarius Green told me he misses me when I don’t check in. That means a lot. Got Brian K Brown on speed dial. Antonio’s deep voice is great on the phone. Henry Ryans and I share stories about our son’s exploits. Brett is the leading scorer on the company basketball team, but you’d never know it. Denise likes to make the phone calls. She keeps the young guys straight in VMI. I’m constantly inspired by Nikkar Balkon’s commitment to improvement. Looks just like Martin Lawrence. Nikkar replaced Shawn Holmes, who was great at diffusing tense situations. Shawn quit work to serve on the mission field. Keith Lofton puts up with my team at work. Hanging out downtown with coworker Anthony at the Super Bowl Experience. Johnny Parks has a great laugh. Joe Lewton didn’t like it when you cost the company extra. Robert Swift looked like Reggie Jackson. Cornel Dore coached my son. Renice and other ladies in our Sunday School class. Gotten to know Norman and Darrell at Turner Field and SunTrust Park. Fun to sit with them at games. I mourn the passing of Miss Marian. Braves games won’t be the same without her smiling face.

 

I could go on. These were just some that popped into my head. Why do I list these friends? Great memories. People I’ve been fortunate to do life with. Sure most of the relationships weren't deep. But they taught me how to love everyone, how to get along with people of all races. I wouldn’t be the same without having known them.

 

My family moved to “the suburbs” when I was in 6th grade, but I went to public schools all my life, including intown junior and senior high schools where I was the minority. In Atlanta I lived intown for almost twenty years. I walked through the Techwood Homes housing projects to get to work at CNN Center, long before Centennial Park cleaned up the area. Done ministry in Grant Park, Seven Bridges, retirement homes, intown homeless shelters, and food banks. When I moved my family outside the perimeter it didn’t change who I am.

 

To me, black people are just people. Not “just” people, but people. Like me. They matter. As a white guy having lived sixty years side by side with blacks, I see no differences in who they are as people -  but huge differences in what they often face in their day to day lives. No way I can comprehend their experience. But I stand with them in this fight.

 

Denison:  Consider this powerful statement by Ibram X. Kendi, executive director of the Antiracist Research and Policy Center: "There's no such thing as being 'not racist.' We are either being racist or antiracist."

 

Loving others, and being anti-racist - is a decision I have to make every time I have a thought, or open my mouth.

 

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Wore my fake leather Wal-Mart sneakers to work today,
paired with my baseball socks.