Wednesday, April 29, 2020

MLB Uni Rankings?

Today Paul Lukas of Uni Watch published his 2020 MLB uniform rankings. If you’ve ever read his blog, you quickly learn that despite a loyal following, his blog is his world, dictated by his rules/pet peeves. You are welcome to disagree, but do so and he will quickly say why you’re wrong. Some peeves I agree with, some not. Peeves such as:
 
1. Purple bad. Green good. ME: whatever. I like blue.
2. Corporate advertisements on uniforms are bad. ME: a sign on the times. I don’t like ads on NBA jerseys or the Nike swoosh on the chest of MLB jerseys.
3. The term “blue collar” is overused to describe players and teams. ME: any more than any other analogy, or the term “iconic” or awesome”?
4. The removal of New Era logos from the side of MLB caps should be celebrated. ME: whatever.
5. Paul lets you know he doesn’t buy $200 polyester shirts (jerseys). He will model Uni Watch t-shirts, basketball uniforms, and hockey sweaters that he sells (he has an explanation for that). I don’t buy $200.00 jerseys, but I do buy them from thrift stores.
6. Native American iconography should be removed from sports. No more Redskins, Indians, Chiefs, or Braves. No more tomahawks or chops. I get it. I’m not going to ram #ChopOn down people’s throats, but I’m not ready to abandon my beloved Braves just yet.
 
Like many in media, Paul has been facing tougher times making a living. He was laid off by ESPN and Sports Illustrated. He did land an occasional gig writing for InsideHook.com, but I wonder if his obvious personal bias, right or wrong, might jeopardize future employment. Perhaps InsideHook appreciates his bias and ideology.     
 
Paul sells various Uni Watch merchandise, such as stickers, pins, mugs, mini-helmets, and the aforementioned apparel. Some appealing to me, others not. I have enough stuff already. What is cool is the personalized Uni Watch membership cards. Like he says, they’re just fun to keep in your wallet. He’s sold hundreds, all displayed on his website.
 
Since I’m cheap, I have yet to spring for a membership card. These days generous readers have been donating memberships for Paul to raffle off. Not sure what uniform I would get on a card, in part because selections are subject to Paul’s rules, like the no Indian iconography, and no purple (except for one day a year). Sometimes I wonder if I really want to claim membership in his community.
 
Paul is anti-tomahawk. Not sure if he is anti-Braves feather, which is what I’d want. Other designs, like the distinctive Maravich-era Hawks striped uniform, don’t transfer well to a membership card. Another option: the back of a UGA helmet, with merit stars circling around Herschel’s number 34.   
 
Anyway, here’s his obviously biased MLB rankings. Green team ranked high. Purple ranked low. Braves and Indians near the bottom, behind several obviously inferior uniforms. Braves also ranked low due to their red alternate jerseys, though several higher ranked teams wear them as well: #9 Orioles, #11 Red Sox, #13 Giants, and #16 Angels. Paul ranked his beloved Mets eighth despite having two different blue jerseys. Oakland ranks second despite two green jerseys.
 
These days MLB teams wear too many alternate jerseys for an old-timer like me. I’m no fan of the Braves red or navy alternate jerseys, but the majority of the fan base are. I’ll include the total number of uniforms each time has, and the color of the alternates.
 
1. Cardinals (4 sets) alts of cream & powder blue.
2. Athletics (5) yellow and the two green alts.
3. Cubs (3) navy alt.
4. Phillies (4) cream and powder blue alts.
5. Dodgers (3) no royal jersey, just two grey road unis.
6. Tigers (2) home and road.
7. Yankees (2) home and road.
8. Mets (4) the two blue alts.
9. Orioles (4) black and orange.
10. Blue Jays (4) royal and powder blue
11. Red Sox (4) red and navy
12. White Sox (4) black and throwback
13. Giants (4) black and orange
14. Brewers (4) pinstripe and navy
15. Padres (5) brown and two camos
16. Angels (3) red
17. Mariners (5) teal, cream, navy
18. Royals (6) powder blue, royal, & 2 alt whites
19. Pirates (5) two alt blacks & one alt white
20. Rays (4) navy and powder blue
21. Astros (4) orange and navy
22. Reds (5) two red alts and one white
23. Nationals (6) red, navy, & 2 white alts
24. Twins (6) red, 2 navys, & powder blue
25. Diamondbacks (5) red, black, & a white alt
26. Rockies (4) black jersey& black vest
27. Rangers (5) red, blue, & powder blue
28. Braves (5) red, navy, cream
29. Indians (4) red, navy
30. Marlins (3) black   
 
The Mets fan wants to change the name of the Braves, and deep six the tomahawk. What if in honor of Hank Aaron we rename the team the Hammers? Then they can sell foam hammers, and fans can chant while swinging the foam hammer.
 
My rankings – except the Braves, I count off for anything not white, grey, cream, or powder blue.
 
1. Braves (5) timeless home uni & cream alt   
2. Cardinals (4) white, grey, cream, powder blue.
3. Yankees (2) classic
4. Tigers (2) road uni not as nice as NYY
5. Dodgers (3) I get the 2 grey jerseys
6. Phillies (4) nice powder blue throwbacks
7. Blue Jays (4) powder blues
8. Padres (5) back in brown
9. Twins (6) powder blues
10. Red Sox (4) despite alternates
11. Cubs (3) despite navy top
12. Mariners (5) nice shades of blue
13. Royals (6) nice shades of blue
14. Rays (4) nice shades of blue
15. Rangers (5) powder blue
16. Indians (4) despite alternates
17. Athletics (5) two green jerseys?
18. Mets (4) two blue jerseys?
19. Brewers (4) despite alternates
20. Angels (3) despite alternate
21. White Sox (4) black bad but nice throwback
22. Giants (4) same as Baltimore
23. Orioles (4) same as Giants
24. Astros (4) same as SF & Orioles
25. Pirates (5) too much black
26. Reds (5) hate the black trim
27. Rockies (4) too much black
28. Nationals (6) too many combos
29. Marlins (3) Black on black? Bleh.
30. Diamondbacks (5) Black.
 
Not the first time I’ve disagreed with Paul. He can have his little world, and I will keep mine.
 
 
 

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